On this day of the 15th of February 2021, I turn 37 years old.
It seems surreal writing this because really, I sometimes still feel like the scared and fearful teenager that doesn’t know anything about life. But as I contemplate that I truly am 37 years old, I realize that I am not that girl anymore and I have a lot of things I could tell her to change her life for the better.
I decided to write a note, or letter per say, to my younger self on what I would tell her now if I could.
1.) Make yourself happy and proud FIRST.
It is very easy to get caught up in trying to make someone else happy, or someone else proud. It starts out with wanting to make our parents proud or make them happy by doing things they want us to do. There isn’t anything wrong with this, and I am grateful for the work ethic that my parents instilled in me at a young age. But there comes a point when we become an adult and we then need to turn our happiness and proudness inward. Are you making yourself happy now? Are you doing the things that you are proud of? This many times takes a deep sense of humility in the area of being honest with yourself. Take moments each day to be still and listen to your heart and your soul to really find what makes you happy and makes you proud. Don’t get stuck chasing happiness in another person because you will eventually end miserable. Don't get stuck chasing happiness in material possessions because they only fill the void for a short time. You can’t find happiness in a relationship, or in a job, or in possessions if you are not first happy and truly love yourself. Start by making YOU happy first and the rest will come. PROMISE!
2.) Live your life with a grateful heart.
Wake up every day and be happy you made the wake up list from God. And if you don’t believe in God, then just thank biology, or whatever it is you believe in, that you opened your eyes this morning. It’s as simple as that. Be grateful each and everyday. For everything. The small things, the big things and everything in between. I 100% believe in the law of attraction. The more you put out positive energy and are grateful for what you have, then the most the universe will send you more things to be grateful for. Same goes for when you are negative, angry, petty or selfish. You will attract what you are putting out in this world. So stay true to you and what you believe and put good out in this world. Don’t worry about the number as your birthdays keep coming. Try to remember that you are blessed to make it to this birthday as many people don’t get that chance. Be grateful and you will have things in your life to continue to be grateful for!
3.) Always keep learning.
In any area of your life, never believe you know EVERYTHING. Because you don’t. You can always learn something from someone, or their point of view, to enhance your life. The worst thing you can do is not learn to grow in all areas of your life. Keep an open mind and an open heart and you will continue to thrive. Read more, take classes, pick up a new hobby. I realized after looking thru some old journals of my grandpa, that I come from a history of creators. It’s in my DNA to create things. You don’t have to have one career or job and just stick to that one thing for the rest of your life. My dad is an orthodontist, but he is an avid builder and wood creator. He creates the most beautiful gifts from wood, and even recycled wood. He even built my childhood home and his office. His dad was a dentist but was a stunning painter(and photographer). He also made jewelry for family and friends. My mothers mom worked at a bank, and also was a painter(and occasionally hair stylist for me and my sisters!) There is no reason that you have to start your life and end your life doing the exact same thing. You can have many hobbies and/or jobs. As long as they make you happy(back to step 1), then it doesn’t matter what you do. Keep learning new things and it helps keep your mind using all of its power.
4.) Don’t let fear win.
We all have some type of fear. Fear of spiders, fear of heights, fear of small spaces. And many of us suffer from Fear of Failure or Fear of Success. What would happen if you failed? Do you feel like the entire world is on your shoulders and if you make one wrong step then you have failed EVERYONE and EVERYTHING around you? That is just not true! That is the fear of failure that keeps you from making that next step of excellence in your life. If I could have taught myself anything was that failure isn’t something that should be feared. There are mistakes, missed steps or bad choices that can lead to something not coming out how we thought, but it doesn’t mean it’s a failure. Learn to look at failure as a trial and error process instead of a step you are trying to avoid like all heck in your life. You can’t fail if you do not quit. Also, don’t let fear stop you from doing the next big step in your life. As I look back on areas in my life and feel regret, it’s always the times or decisions that I let fear get in my way. I had the opportunity to go to Austria in college for the summer and create my own photography curriculum and I chickened out because I had to go by myself and I really dislike flying. This was even before I realized I wanted to go into photography as a career. But the time I decided I didn’t want to go to Dental School, but instead go to photography school in California, was the best decision I could have made. Was it scary, HECK YES. I was moving across the country away form everyone I knew and loved, where I didn’t know a single person. But I took that fear as motivation instead of a reason to quit and I went for it. The fear in both of those situations were the exact same. One I let step me from experiencing something amazing, and the other I let help shape my life. The worst thing you can do is let fear run your life and run your decisions. Learn to take a look at the fear and analyze when it really is helping you(like walking out in traffic) or when it’s hindering you from living the life you want.
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